UTSA researcher James Bray shares tips to reduce holiday stress

(Dec. 21, 2017) -- People feel stressed during the holidays due to their busy schedules, the frequency they’re around family members and the demands they face to host dinner and house guests, according to James Bray, professor and chair of the Department of Psychology at The University of Texas at San Antonio (UTSA).

“This time of year, people can experience stress related to holiday planning and family dynamics,” said Bray. “For some, this is the first time they are meeting new family members or splitting time between two homes.”

Dr. Bray shares these recommendations to help reduce stress and enjoy all that the season has to offer:

Anticipate delays. Flights could be delayed, traffic could be bad traffic and guests may be late to visit. Try to slow down and keep in mind that not everyone will arrive on time.
Contingency planning. Create back-up plans for travel or holiday meals. If you know that something might go wrong, it’s easier come up with alternative ways to respond to the situation so you aren’t caught off guard.
Open communication. New members of blended families or in-laws might not know about your holiday traditions. Talk openly about rituals before they happen, so they feel included.
Ask for help. Don’t feel obligated to cook the entire holiday meal or clean the whole house alone. Ask others to chip in and help clean, cook or even wrap gifts.
Keep it simple. Spending time with your loved ones should always be the top priority. Stay focused on the important things.

See things from a child’s eyes. Children of divorced parents want to see all their family members around the holidays. When children are visiting, it’s important to let them call their primary caregiver and be open to their needs. Remember also that being around new people can be overwhelming. Be patient.

Relax. Take some time for yourself. Enjoy exercising, reading a book or just taking some quiet time alone to recharge.

Keep a sense of humor. Laughter and focusing on fun can help people overcome bumps in the road. A few challenges should not ruin holiday gatherings with loved ones.

Bray joined the UTSA Department of Psychology in August 2017. His research is funded by the National Institutes of Health and focuses on adolescent substance use, divorce, remarriage and stepfamilies. He has published more than 200 articles in major journal and books and presented his work in 20 countries.

— Kara Soria

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